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[she blinks curiously and peers back at that.]

What do you mean? Were you afraid of how I was going to respond?

Yeah. I remember lying... but because I'd get in trouble if I didn't. And I was scared. I know I was, but I don't get why.

[She looked over at Ciel, truly not understanding at all.] Do you know why?

[She stares back, and...

Nods quietly.]

It's the mentality of these times. Liking someone the same gender as you is frowned upon by society, it was even considered a mental problem at some point. Someone with an orientation like yours living in 1950ies America would be called a disgrace, shunned by family and friends if you were caught.

[sounds like she's reciting from some textbook or something, though.]

...why? Love is love.

[Marisa asking all the hard questions because she just can't grasp the concept of love being 'wrong'.]

I'm afraid I don't know. The Bible emphasizes on procreation, but it's not like it has any verses specifically picking on people who aren't heterosexuals. Things probably got twisted out of proportions somewhere down in history. The world is being more open about it in the 21st century, but in many cultures, that's still an unacceptable thing. [She gives a small shrug, not thinking much of the topic until...

...

...This is the sort of talk kids have with their parents too, don't they?

Haha. No chuckling out loud now, not this time.]

[Please. Okay, maybe it is, but it's already been established Marisa didn't exactly have a home life and this isn't an issue in Gensokyo. She IS the Witch of Love.]

Oh. I guess I can get the whole needing to have kids thing cause otherwise humans will just die out. But still. Love is love. [She shrugs.] I don't wanna have kids anyways. Probably be terrible at it anyways. Can barely take care of myself and then there's my research and the whole short life expectancy thing...

[which is good for you!! growing up not-so-healthily but free...]

That's the sound reasoning, isn't it. Haha, you'd be more suited for the father figure in a family, but I agree. You can barely handle yourself as is, God help your children if you actually do end up having any.

There'd have to be a guy my age I was interested in. The only one I am is too old for me and doesn't like me anyways. Not like that. He's probably the closest thing I have to family. More of a father than my real one, anyways.

But I figure I only have another twenty years if I'm lucky. Shouldn't have kids anyways.

Oh, I didn't just mean if you found a boy. I'm sure you'll manage, even if it was a girl.

[she is

possibly implying what she may be implying]

[MOVING ON]

You could make that time longer if you changed a few things about your routine, [...] Mari. It's not entirely too late, just yet.

[Not even thinking about what things she could manage along those lines with magic.]

The only way for that to happen is if I gave up magic, did what my real father wanted, and moved back to the Human Village and took over the shop. I won't do that. Magic is my life. I still haven't found what I'm looking for, what I want, what I need. If I don't push myself, push my limits, I'll never get there. I'll never find the key.

And in Gensokyo, that means I'm not going to live too far into my thirties. And if I do, I probably won't be human anymore. I want to die human, ze.

["I want to die human."

...

Have a quiet and subdued look of mild shock, there. Because

hm

wow

that hits close to home, huh.]

[When there's no response, Marisa rolls fully over and pillows her head, looking at Ciel.]

...what'd I do?

[--whoops. Back on guard now, and she simply smiles softly back in response, like always.]

Nothing. So it can't be helped, hm? "The star that burns the brightest, burns the quickest."

[Marisa frowns. She caught that, Ciel, and isn't happy it's being brushed aside.]

Yeah. As long as I live long enough to see the next Hakurei born, I'll know Gensokyo will still be safe when I'm gone.

[c'mon cut her some slack, what do you want her to tell you, "that's a good thing to strive for" when you told her you want to die as a human? IT DOESN'T SOUND RIGHT...]

So you'll be pushing Hakurei-san around once you get back, then? [oh oh are you going to be nosy do you need tips...]

I always push her around, ze. [Marisa grins.] She just also pushes back. With a barrier.

Damn Border Hax.

Being meddlesome is an art, young lady. Just because you can't break a few barriers doesn't mean there are other ways. You better take this seriously!

Hey, hey, she knows she has to spawn at some point, ze. And I have my own ways. [They usually involve sake.]

Still, make an effort to get creative. [...] You would make an eccentric godmother too, now that I think about it!

[/priorities...]

Oh, believe me, I'll get creative, ze~

Good. If you don't, I'll come lecture you during your dreams, Mari.

Uh. Hell no. You are so not allowed in my dreams. Like ever. Ever.

How come? Do you have any spells to stop me?

Y-yes! [At least she could make one.] You can't come into my dreams anyways. You're not a mage.

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