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...that's not a fair question. You totally suck, ze.

[She chuckles quietly, her demeanor relaxing at the much more familiar sight of Marisa complaining resurfacing.]

Life isn't fair. Sometimes, you have to make unfair choices, and sometimes, unfair choices are made to you. Can you humor me this once, if you really had to choose one?

[She gets quiet as she thinks on that a moment.]

...guess I'd rather have never had it, than having had it but didn't know I'd lost it.

Cause it's mine.

I see. So you don't like the idea of losing things: better to have less for keeps, than more to lose. Is it something like that? [the wording can be tricky, it'd be good to make sure.]

...I've lost enough already.

[Where did that come from? It was laced with sadness, an emotional pain that came from nowhere as far as Marisa could recall. She even looks confused by her own words.]

[leans against...]

Mm, you have. But if it was me, I think I'd choose to lose anyway, even if things end up more painful that way. I'm not really one for sentimentalities, honestly, [/may or may not get a reaction from the hypocrisy radar, oops...] but... Regardless of if something happens to a person for a reason or not, it still generally tends to end up changing them somehow. So it'd be disrespectful to favor the outcome where potential possibilities never happen, I think, to yourself and the things that could have influenced you. That 'thing' can be someone else too, after all.

[...

She sighs quietly, her expression-- serene, and smiling a little, but... There's something faintly ironic about it too, isn't there?]

Aha, I'm sorry. I'm making no sense again, am I?

[Hopefully Marisa won't remember this later, haha. ...Provided that she'll be able to get back her memories in the first place, but Ciel's trying to work towards that, even if she IS getting sidetracked.]

...not one bit, ze. Get to the point, Mom.

Haha, I'm sorry. Basically, I'm saying you should take it back, because it was yours to begin with. If you're really opposed to going personally but do want what's yours back, I can go by myself and see if I can't have it done in your place, as long as I have your consent. [...] But that still leaves one thing, though. Would you want it back, now that you know something of yours has been taken away?

...why wouldn't I?

Should I really give you reasons that might encourage you to NOT want to?

You really don't understand rhetorical questions, do you?

Well actually...!

[What if her initial question was rhetorical

what if]

Shut up, Mom.

[Marisa flops on her side.]

[hahaha yeah this sounds legit.

She'll laugh lightly and tilt her head back, keeping an eye on Marisa's slouched form.

...]

Are you happy with how things are now, Marisa?

I dunno. It's nice, but I dunno. Sometimes I feel like I'm trapped and wished I could just jump off the roof and fly like a bird. Some freedom.

Not sure I fit... [She shrugs.] Might just be senior year jitters. Not like I've got a sweetheart I'm gonna marry when I graduate. [At least, not a boy she's sweet on.]

You'll definitely be leaving a trail of stars behind if you got off your wings, hehe. [this is not cheesy okay, she's serious!!]

Thinking that far ahead? [she chuckles quietly.] You never struck me as someone who'd willingly settle, Mari. ...Or at least, it'll have to be someone who can let you come and go as you please.

No, I'm not. [She half-rolls toward Ciel to look at her.] But you know what it's like. We graduate... we get married. We have kids. Whether we like it or not.

Look, I know what we're supposed to do - be the good wife and all - but, just cause it worked for you doesn't mean it's what I want.

You'd be surprised at the worth of simplicity in other places, but that's neither here or there. [she keeps going without skipping a beat.] What do you want, then? Do you have a clear idea?

I'm seventeen, ze. Like I have any idea what I actually want?

[She frowned.] I just know... I wanna do something grand. Something that no one thinks is possible.

Not that I know what that is.

You have plenty of time and I'll never rush you, but that's something in and of itself, isn't it?

[a beat.]

Would you want to keep chasing that 'grand' thing, even if you might get hurt and suffer losses in the process?

[Marisa flopped back down and let out a sigh.]

Well, nothing ever worth having was ever easy.

[She'll keep watch, her expression... (uncharacteristically?) fond.] But you wouldn't go for it if you didn't believe that the end would make the struggle worth it, would you?

Duh.

There's a chance that it wouldn't, though. You didn't overlook the possibility, did you? [stop looking so chipper while tossing around grim possibilities, ciel...]

You know, Mom, lemme tell you something you might not have learned back in ancient civilization. Being fearless doesn't mean not having fear. It means not letting the fear control you.

Except when it comes to the Postman.

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